June 5, 2005
"After the Kids are Gone"
Extreme Makeover Family Edition—Part 10
Selected Scriptures
How to Prepare for an Empty Nest
1. Recognize the seasonal nature of parenting.
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.
—Ecclesiastes 3:1
2. Create a marriage that is partner-focused rather than child-focused.
Live happily with the woman you love through the fleeting days of life, for the wife God gives you is your best reward down here for all your earthly toil.
—Ecclesiastes 9:9 (TLB)
3. Get a life before the children leave home.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
—Jeremiah 29:11
"Have you found your job, your mission, your passion?"
God has made us what we are. In Christ Jesus, God made us to do good works, which God planned in advance for us to live our lives doing.
—Ephesians 2:10
Ideas for Grandparents
1. Accept your age and stay young at heart.
The glory of young men is their strength, gray hair the splendor of the old.
—Proverbs 20:29
Read: Ecclesiastes 12:1
"Honor God now! Don't regret not honoring Him when you are old."
Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
—Colossians 3:12
"The more self-centered we are when we are young, the more impatient we will be when we are old."
2. Don't hold grudges.
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
—Colossians 3:13
"A grudge will make you a "grump" instead of a "Gramp" or "Gram."
3. Be a people-lover and a peace-builder.
And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
—Colossians 3:14-15
4. Keep learning and teach biblical principles.
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all int the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
—Colossians 3:16-17
5. Develop prayer as a lifestyle.
A good man leaves an inheritance for his children's children...
—Proverbs 13:22
"Not all inheritances are financial."
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
—Philippians 4:6-7
Lifework
Marriage, parenting and being a grandparent is the life-long process designed to teach us to see the needs of another as more important than our own. God's plan for you is wider and deeper than anything in your wildest dreams. To think this way requires an intentional shift in your thinking, that can only come about through the power of God in your life.
Prayer: Dear Father, help me to catch your vision for my life and my family and chase it into the future you have planned for me. Please do an extreme makeover in my life so that I honor you and bless my family with your love and peace. I ask this in Jesus' name. Amen.
Extreme Makeover Family Edition—Week 10
Personal and Group Study
Getting Started
- Share a special memory of your grandparents. Did you live close or far from your grandparents? What legacy (lesson) has been left by your grandparents?
- When you need to feel like a new person, what outfit do you like to wear?
Digging Deeper: Read Colossians 3:1-17
- What is the way to spiritual life (Colossians 3:1-4)? How does that contrast to the things that don't lead to life (Colossians 2:16-23)?
- How is setting your "mind and heart" on Christ related to what He has already done for us? How is it related to what He will do for us?
- What contrasts do you see between the "clothes of the earthly nature" and those of God's chosen people?
- What does all of the "poutting off and putting on" actually inolve: A quick change act? A disguise? A burial serivde? A shopping spree?
- What practical difference does this "new clothing" actually make in the life of a child, a parent, and a grandparent? What confirms that all of these relationships are built around Christ?
Applying It To My Life
- What legacy do you want to leave your grandchildren?
- With what peice of Chris't character do you need to clothe yourself in order to be the parent or grandparent you want to be?
- What one characteristic do you value most in those who are older than you? How can you make that characteristic part of your life?